Rules of the Road

"Life is a hiiighway..."

Ahem. Pardon me while I get some Tom Cochrane (sorry, Rascal Flatts) out of my system.

Let's lay down some rules reagrding this here little blog. I'll let you know what you can expect from me and what I expect from you. Fair? Fair.

What you can expect from me is as follows (humor my minor obsession with lists and bullet points, won't you?):

• Daily to almost-daily posts. I promise you that I will not post for six days straight, achieve blogger exhaustion, and abandon all memory of this blog. If I'm taking a hiatus of more than a day or two, I'll make sure you know why. Chances are there's some sort of life event that in one way or another will prove obnoxious to me (read: hilarious to you) that is getting in the way and deserving of a post anyway.
• Honesty - honestly! You may or may not like and/or agree with what I have to say, and I respect that. But rest assured I'm not going to couch my opinion on anything. I'm generally pretty open minded and often play Devil's Advocate to myself (FYI - it is perfectly healthy to argue with yourself. It's also awesome. You always win!)
• A BROAD range of topics. Remember, this blog is about two things: random and ME. That means on any given day I may post about any or all of the following: macaroni and cheese, skinny jeans, cat vomit (and the effects of stepping in it at 2 a.m.), cupcakes, weight loss (and said relationship with all of the above...except maybe the cat vomit), politics, religion, and money (I'm controversial like that), Paula Deen, reality TV, Disney, Disney, Disney, Disney, shoes, Disney, my commute to and from work (by popular demand), the Mayans, other blogs, AND my theory that MATH is really a MYTH (only on dinky little difference in spelling - coincidence? I think not). Also, posts may range from outright comical and outrageous to serious or heartbreaking. Sometimes all of that, in the same post (what can I say? I can be moody.)
• Attention to your comments. I love attention. (See, there's that honesty thing.) I'm going to assume you like it too  So if you comment, I'll probably comment back. Gives me the warm and fuzzies.
• Privacy. There are a limited number of things I will not post about, the first being my job. Why? Because generally I like it and I'd like to keep it. Those of you who know me and/or work with me, let's please keep work references on the no-no list. You can also be assured that I will not refer to you by name and/or photo without your permission first. Not everyone wants to be featured on a future-superstar blog and I respect that. I will always contact you if I want to identify you in some specific way. Otherwise I'll refer to people generically if I feel it's necessary as friends, family, etc. (I'm in the process of getting blanket approval from my parents and siblings. There is too much funny stuff that happens in our family to NOT post it here. Seriously, I'm not sure why we aren't yet a reality show. Jersey Shore who?)
• A Rated PG-13 blog at worst...most of the time. I will do my best to use substitutes for expletives 99.9% of the time (sometimes it just slips out). If I think something in a blog might be any of the following, I promise to start the post with a disclaimer:
• offensive to specific parties or to finer sensibilities (I've always wanted to use that phrase...I've also always wanted to be Southern, so there's that...and I mean Scarlett O'Hara not Sookie Stackhouse Southern)
• inappropriate for children (Some of this stuff might make EXCELLENT bedtime reading)
• inappropriate for work (I know you read at work, don't lie!)
• inappropriate for your kittehs (they're sensitive, you know)

What I expect from you (it's a MUCH shorter list, I promise):

• That you read my blog. Oh, and share it if you like it! This isn't just a pasttime for me but the first steps on what I hope will be a successful (and I'm just pipe-dreaming here, prosperous) literary road. Follow me here on Blogger, link to me, e-mail me, repost on FB, it's all good!
• Please use the comments box RESPONSIBLY and RESPECTFULLY. I'm not stranger to, nor am I offended by, a friendly argument or difference of opinion. Key word: FRIENDLY. If you're going to insult or disrespect me or anyone else that has posted, I'd rather you keep it to yourself. Any outright rude, disrespectful or otherwise inappropriate comments will be removed. Otherwise, feel free to tell me I'm wrong! (I double dog dare you.)

That about sums it up, folks. I want to thank everyone again for all of their love, support, and ridiculing in the process of getting this blog off the ground. So far, it's little fledgling wings are flapping away to keep it aloft. I hope to make it SOAR.